Tired - So... Very... Tired...

I'm tired... Exhausted... Fatigued... Drained... Consumed... Spent... Empty... Wasted... Pooped... Worn out... Done for... Run-down... Finished... You get the idea.

Everyone close to me (including myself) has a chronic condition and/or illness:

- My mom has a laundry list of conditions but right now, she has been having fainting spells?/seizures?/something like that. She already has had several falls in the past few years, with many of them requiring at least an ER visit and sometimes a hospital stay. But the thing is, they can't find out what's wrong so they can't treat it.

- My dad has heart and blood pressure issues and is a diabetic. He has had a sore on his foot since last summer and it looks like there infection in the bone. Most likely he will need surgery but they are getting a second opinion. Until then he's supposed to try to stay off his foot but the lack of movement makes his diabetes worse. It's pretty much uncontrolled and he needs for his blood glucose to stay below 150 for his foot to heal. It's not even close and if he has surgery, then that will also have to heal.

- My boyfriend has an auto-immune disease and depression. The auto-immune disease has been flaring up a LOT recently and he's having a hard time making it through work each day. Though it's early in the evening, he's asleep right now and this is not the first evening he has had to do this recently. Everyday life wears him out and he used to be the epitome of healthy and athletic.

- I have many physical and mental issues, which I won't go into now. But I'm in a down cycle with my bipolar and I am having something go on with my stomach.

- But my daughter is the one who has torn me up tonight. She has fibromyalgia, POTS (dysautonomia), depression, anxiety and major back issues to name a few things. Today she is hurting so badly she couldn't even get in the car to meet me for supper. She's just 20 years old! It tears me up. She needs to get a job but she can't in her condition.

And I can't fix it - Any of it.

GREAT! My mom just came in here (I live with my parents) and my dad is sick and she says he's burning up with a fever. It won't ever end...

And I don't know how I'm going to make it. I very much want to just be the last synonym in the first sentence: Finished.


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