I'm now on my husband's insurance. It's good insurance but it has a huge deductible, which for someone like me who has multiple mental and physical health conditions, it makes a difference.
Last year my deductible was really low and my co-pays ranged from $0 to $30 for regular stuff and then no more than a couple hundred for big tests/procedures. This year so far I've had some doctor's visits that were "only" $80 to my PT for my shoulder being $130 for each session.
Why am I starting this blog with this information? Another hit in this area has been my counseling. Last year I was able to afford to meet with my therapist once every week or two. With the increase in fee, I moved it to once every three weeks for now... and it might be once a month those months that money's really tight.
When I went from two sessions a week to one due to the cost, my physical therapist gave me more exercises to do at home since I was missing a session every week. So... I brought up that idea to my mental health therapist - to have "homework" to work on during this large gap of time.
Okay... now I'm finally to the main point of this point - scarcity vs abundance. My therapist has brought me a long way in the time we've worked together and we've tackled many of my issues. However, a new one came up right before our last session together.
Right now I can't remember which past scenario in my life that I shared with her that led to this topic. However, I wrote down what she wanted me to work on - and it was to start with reading about the scarcity mindset.
Honestly, I've been putting it off. I would much rather work on a puzzle or play on my phone than work on these issues. But one thing I've learned from PT is that the exercises I do really make a difference - and some things I couldn't do at all a few weeks ago, I can now do with ease. It's been a useful reminder that the little things matter more than we think and progress, even though slow, is still progress.
After a thorough time doing my PT exercises, I felt it was time to tackle this.
First, I researched the scarcity mindset. I had heard of it before so I knew a little bit but here are some of the things I learned. (Sorry that I don't have references. I copied and pasted the points that stood out to me the most before I thought about writing this post. If you want to read more about it, just google "scarcity mindset" and it'll probably take you to some of the articles I read.)
Here are the main things I learned from reading about 5-6 articles... (the point is copied and pasted from the article - the paragraph underneath is my paraphrase/explanation of the point).
First, a short definition I found for scarcity: "Someone with a scarcity mindset is one that focuses on the lack of things,"
- Find one abundant thing to focus on.
In other words, certain areas of life might be lacking, but if you look hard enough, all of them won't be. One example is that finances may be really tight but you might have plenty of time. That's true for me, especially while I'm still recovering from my rotator cuff surgery. I need to focus on the fact that I have an "abundant" amount of time.
- How would it feel to be abundant? What would your life look like?
That's a hard one for me and something I'm going to have to really explore. Some of the areas that I know I focus on scarcity rather than abundance include finances, food, energy/stamina, ability to handle social situations well... and I'm going to have to think about others. Like I said earlier, areas of abundance at this point include time, intelligence, and the love of my husband. But what if I felt I had enough money... what if I felt like I don't have to eat extra because if I don't, I'll feel sick before I can eat again... what if I was able to move and go like I could 10-15 years ago? This is definitely something to think about...
- Journaling might help by both helping you identify areas where you already are abundant as well as areas where you’d like to focus on being more abundant.
This point is why I'm doing this blog post. If I'm working on personally, maybe sharing the process will help someone else.
- A scarcity mentality sees limitations instead of opportunities.
In other words, one example is - losing your job means focusing on a lack of income instead of the chance to try a new career. The example this article gave was, "Wow, I have 25 years of marketing experience, which will be a huge asset if I decide to start a business"
- Ask yourself if you had all the time and money in the world and you knew you couldn’t fail, what would you be doing? Questions like that will help to open your mind up to what’s possible.
Whoa... I've heard of doing this before but it was too scary. I ALWAYS feel like I'm going to fail at anything I try to do. Yep... definitely need to work on that.
- Scarcity mentality refers to people seeing life as a finite pie, so that if one person takes a big piece, that leaves less for everyone else.
This is one I didn't even realize went with scarcity. I also have a really hard time with this concept. I hate being judgmental, but I am. I'm incredibly competitive and though I hate to admit it, I have a hard time sincerely congratulating someone for doing something well or accomplishing something that I haven't yet accomplished. Yeah... I had never really pondered that it's actually my belief that if someone else wins, I lose - and I hate losing. There's not enough out there for both of us to win.
Okay, I've got to cook some brunch for my husband and me. This is just the beginning of this journey for me. I'll try to occasionally update how it's going on here, but no promises. (If you've read my blog for a while, you know how many Part 1's don't ever get a Part 2.)
Oh, I almost forgot - one thing I'm already doing that was recommended in the articles was to focus on gratitude. I didn't copy and paste it because it's one thing I had already decided to do, but in a different way than in the past.
For the last two years, I've put stickers on my calendar instead of X-ing off the days, so I can easily see what day it is - and stickers look better than X's. This year I'm trying something new. Instead of a sticker, each morning I write on the previous day something I am grateful for that happened on that day.
I'm hoping that as the days, weeks, and months pass, it'll be a very visual reminder that a lot of good has happened in 2023, even if it's not all good (which life never can be).
Even though it's a month into the year already, here's to having a grateful year!