Spotlight on Stigma... Welcomed but Not Accepted

It's something that very few would do... walk away from something they've prepared their entire life for, something that could easily disappoint an entire nation, something that many wouldn't or couldn't understand. But Simone Biles did it at this year's Olympic Games.  According to an article on ESPN.com, Biles said, "Once I came out here [to compete], I was like, 'No, mental is not there, so I just need to let the girls do it and focus on myself." I applaud her courage. I have a hard time letting my mental health issues get in the way of tasks that could disappoint just one person, much less potentially an entire world of fans.  Biles hasn't always had it easy or been a star. When she was young, she had a horrible home life until she was adopted by her maternal grandfather and his wife. She was bullied in high school due to her muscular build and was given grief by the public when it was discovered that she has ADHD. She admitted being one of the...

Does anyone else have information overload from the year+ of virtual conferences due to COVID? Before COVID, I encountered some amazing conferences, workshops, and seminars that I would have loved to take part in. However, travel time, admission fees, and making a commitment well before the event (not knowing if I would need to work) made a natural limitation in the number of events I could participate in. Then came COVID - and the world went virtual.  Every group I'm part of started holding those same conferences, workshops, and seminars online. Woo-hoo! That meant no travel time, greatly reduced admission fees, and being able to cancel at the last minute because you would almost always get a recording of the information later. For that matter, it was rare that a cancellation was needed because I had very little work as it was.  The first few months of this were just short of heaven. I was loading my little information-starved mind by the bucketful. I was going to meetings th...

  (Author’s Note: I know there are actual differences in the terms of “abstinence”, “sobriety”, and “recovery”. But for the purpose of this article, I’m lumping the three terms together and using the word “sober/sobriety” to mean any of those three things. Furthermore, this article is based on https://www.huffpost.com/entry/the-real-cause-of-addicti_b_6506936 )   Those of us in addition recovery know it well – the opposite of addiction is sobriety.   This is why almost every addict first showed up at a 12-Step support group – to find a way to quit addictive behavior… to become sober.   But what if the opposite of addiction isn’t sobriety? If it isn’t, then what is?   First, a quick background on addiction. This stigma about addiction started with the scientific community, according to www.drugabuse.gov .  In [RC1]   the 1930s, it was thought that addicts were “morally flawed or lacking in willpower.” Overcoming addiction usually involved punishm...

(Originally written March 17, 2020 and for some reason never got added to this blog.) It has been a while since I’ve spent time writing. I have been sick, then super busy making up for being sick, then just super busy. My writing has been pushed aside more than once when I really wanted to... because, in this time of such uncertainty, I felt this wasn't being "productive" (with my definition at the moment meaning “do something to make money”). Well, I hit the breaking point just a few minutes ago and it doesn't matter if it's technically "productive" or not, I need to write.   The timing has been weird on this one. I'm about to have cataract surgery and due to a test I need to have before the surgery, I have had to go without contacts for a week. Given the nature of my businesses, wearing my old glasses has made it very difficult to do some of my jobs and impossible to do others.    I have known this for a few weeks and have been preparing fo...

Independence Day fell on a Sunday this year, so it was extra fun! (Insert loads of sarcasm into those last two words.) Because so many were out of work and school on Monday, we got to be bombarded by the sounds of fireworks for TWO nights, not just one!  So...  much...  fun!  (Insert even more sarcasm into those three words.) Our across-the-street neighbors decided to put on a major fireworks show. As I had no idea how long the Sunday night show would last and my boyfriend and I were hanging out playing a puzzle game, I elected to stay inside and didn't watch. The next night, my boyfriend and I were trying to finish a movie so we missed seeing that evening's extravaganza.  When I say we missed  watching and   seeing , I want to make it clear that we did NOT miss hearing the fireworks. They sounded like they were literally shooting them right outside of my bedroom window. I don't like loud noises; I haven't my entire life. As a child, I hated going to t...

The last few days have been hard. My daughter's best friend of 14 years died. I'm sure you automatically assumed that this was a person. It wasn't. It was one of her cats - one she got when she was 7 years old. She felt a special bond with Pumpkin from the minute she saw him. We had found someone in the paper who had a bunch of kittens. My plan was to bring home two because there are few things cuter than cats playing together.  So my daughter and I had an understanding when we got there - I would pick out one and she would pick out one.  It was a big decision. They were all cute and since we were the first to get there, we had several to choose from. I quickly chose an orange and white tabby, who, along with his stripes had a white belly and white on some of his legs. My daughter named him Tiger. My daughter also quickly found the one she wanted, but it wasn't a quick decision. The kitten-who-would-be-named Pumpkin had some kind of infection in both eyes and I didn...

 ... and he was adorable and cute and cuddly and flirted with me. Nothing unusual about any of that. It was what I realized about myself that was somewhat unusual. I haven't held a baby in at least 15 years. Now... some of that is just because I'm not around them very often. My adult daughter isn't planning to have kids; none of my nieces or nephews have gone that route just yet; and I recently moved and so I don't have any friends nearby who have grandchildren. The church I attend is made up of mostly older adults and we rarely have babies there. So I'm just not exposed to them very much. But even if I did have them around, I know I wouldn't be holding them unless necessary (like someone just handing me their baby so that they can do something).  You might think this is because I don't like children. However, it's the exact opposite. Until recently, my life centered around children - my daughter, her friends, and those I babysat, nannied, or taught. I p...