Choices... A Love Story

This blog is so serious and often very depressing. I tend to vent about all that is wrong in my life and sometimes forget that there's a lot good there too. So, though late because I've been very busy and somewhat sick, in honor of what Valentine's Day really means (not what Hallmark/the chocolate companies/the flower shops try to make it into), I present my personal love story...

They met online. Each had been involved in a long-term relationship that ended. They both realized, once distanced from these relationships, that they had been toxic. Each was an amazing person who had a lot to offer a partner but had been beaten down by the ones they chose.

Photography brought them together as it was highlighted on each of their dating site profiles. It also almost brought them apart after one asked the other… “Canon or Nikon?” and the answer was wrong. She was Nikon; he was Canon. It was so sad. They would never be able to share lenses or even speak the same language for settings.

This budding relationship was further hindered when a similar question was asked… “iPhone or Android?” Again, the answer was wrong. She was Android; he was iPhone. They also would never be able to Facetime or share all the same apps – and he was able to hear Siri’s angelic voice when he needed information where she had to almost yell, “Hey, Google!” to get the same response.

Thankfully, the last major question… “PC or Mac?” was answered the same by both parties. They were both PC! Though this wasn’t as big an issue as camera brands and cell phone platforms, it seemed there was hope after all. This led to their first face-to-face date which included barbeque and kissing by a lake in the moonlight. Neither wanted it to end.

By this point, they had learned enough about each other to want to try to overcome those two earlier almost insurmountable barriers. Maybe it was because each had known what it was to love someone who took advantage of that love. Maybe it was because they did have a lot in common after all, despite their oppositional preferences of cameras and phones. Maybe it was because there is such a thing as “soul-mates” and this powerful connection was felt by both.

Whatever the reason, they quickly became great friends. They found a spot by a river that was almost exactly equidistant between their homes where they would meet and hang out. Free time in between date nights was spent talking and texting each other. It quickly became routine to stay on the phone each evening until she, an early riser, was almost asleep.

Need it be stated in writing? It seemed that they were falling in love.

There was one other major barrier, though… She was also dating someone else. He worked in Information Technology. Actually, Mr. I.T. was the one who encouraged her to date others as his wife had passed away and he realized he wasn’t ready for a serious relationship. She hadn’t dated him long, but she thought she might love him.

Because she had never been the kind of person to date more than one person at a time and she couldn’t keep such an important secret to herself, she soon let each know about the other. Mr. I.T. was a little blue, as he kind of hoped that she wouldn’t find someone else and would be there for him when he was ready. Mr. Photographer was caught off guard but wasn’t upset because they had never discussed being exclusive.

For a couple of months, she pondered incessantly about what to do. Each one had characteristics that she loved. However, she knew she couldn’t go on indefinitely dating both as it was tearing her up inside.

Finally, she made the difficult decision.

She first went to talk to her soon-to-be former love interest, Mr. I.T. He was sad but wasn’t surprised. He knew her well enough to notice that she had been rapidly falling for the other. They both cried as they said their goodbyes and promised to stay friends.

Then she called the other. He had a difficult time comprehending her through all her tear-filled hiccups. All he could understand through the blubbering was that she wanted him to meet at “their spot.” Though it was late on a weeknight, he immediately said he would head that way. She did the same.

When he got there, he invited her into his car, wondering and worried about the outcome of this conversation. He then just held her, trying to calm her down so she could tell him what had brought on the waterworks.

She was finally calm enough to say three little words. No, they aren’t the words one might expect to be said in this situation, but it meant even more than the standard three little words...

She said, “I choose you."

She is still choosing him to this day.