The Difference between Judgement and Compassion

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Judgement. Something that I completely hate that others do. In fact, the premise of this blog is to counteract the judgement that so many feel towards those with invisible illnesses - and the judgement that is felt by those individuals.

However, judgement is an aspect of my life that I hate, but have a hard time overcoming. (See my 9.16.19 post about this: https://www.spotlightonstigma.com/2019/09/judging.html.) 

I judge so much - I judge the food I eat; I judge the work I've done; I judge how I act (and how much I fail). After all, I'm not only the most important peson in the world, I'm always right.

(God, forgive me!)

In case this is your first post, something you need to know is that I deal with bipolar type 2 as well as having other mental health issues. One of the effects of all this is latching onto a topic and not letting go until I've completely exhausted learning about it. YouTube is my best friend in this pursuit (or my worst enemy, depending on your perspective.)

Sometimes I don't even know how I started with a new topic. (I guess I can thank the almighty YouTube's algorithm.) But sometime this past month I started watching actual court proceedings. 

The main topic that drew me there was watching a video about a "SovCit" (sovereign citizen). This is a group of people who feel that the government doesn't have any control over them. They have a completely crazy script they use, especially during a traffic stop or in a court hearing. I advise looking them up if you are even a little bit interested, as it really is fascinating.

This led to more generic court hearings - about "Karens," spoiled brats, or, on the flip side, compassion showed within some of the courts hearings. 

Sprinkled in with these were some regular court hearings - all kinds of cases like landlord disputes, custody issues, and, of course, various criminal matters.

One day I saw one of those videos and the judge allowed the defendent to share her story. I really felt for her. In my humble opinion, she wasn't completely responsible for what she did. I think that she had some mental health issues that affected her thought processes and actions.

I later told my husband about that case and I was trying to justify how I felt compassion for her when I laughed at and judged some of the others. (I already confessed that I struggle with this so don't judge - lol!)

It was then that I had an epiphany. The difference between those I made fun of and that one young girl was that I heard her backstory. I knew how she got to where she currently was. I could identify with some of the thiings that had happened to her and recognized that "except for the grace of God go I." 

It changed everything. I still judge, unfortunately, but I'm better about pausing and thinking about why someone is doing what they are doing, not just judging their actions.

So, when you start to judge, try to stop for a moment and think about the why and not just the what that person is doing. After all, the difference between judgement and compassion is simply knowing someone's backstory.



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